How do I know what to expect at a service?
Going to a new church for the first time can be very daunting, especially if it is the first time you've been to a service anywhere for a long time. The aim of this guide is not to explain every aspect of the service (and it wouldn't make much sense until you've experienced it anyway), but to help put you at ease.
The important thing to remember is that no-one will be taking notes about what you do or don't do. If you come to the 8.00am mass or to evensong on a Sunday you will be part of a smaller congregation so you may well feel a little more self-conscious; the congregation at the main 10.00 parish mass is much larger however, and you won't be the only person coming for the first time. We hope you will find it easy to relax and be absorbed in what is going on in the service.
When you arrive someone should greet you at the door and give you a service booklet, a hymn book, and the weekly sheet. Feel free to sit anywhere in the church (except for some special occasions, you don't need to worry about reserved seats) . Children are welcome at all our services, but the 10.00 service is when we particularly cater for them. There is a creche for the youngest children, and Sunday School for older children. It is fine to keep your child in church with you during the service, but if the child gets restless it would probably be kinder on them as well as on the rest of the congregation to take them out for a bit.
We try to keep announcements to a minimum as they tend to disrupt the flow of the service, but the service booklet is fairly easy to follow, and anyone sitting nearby will be happy to help. Try not to worry about sitting and standing at the wrong times - the best thing is to take your cue from others. If you really want to know, the normal practice is to stand for hymns and for the Gospel reading, either stand, sit or kneel for prayers, and sit for the first two (one during the week) readings, sermon and notices. You may notice certain gestures which people make - the sign of the cross for example, and bowing the head slightly at the name of Jesus. The sign of the cross - tracing a cross across your body by touching your forehead, abdomen, left shoulder and right shoulder with your right hand - is traditionally made at the beginning and end of mass and other times, usually accompanied with the words '[in the name of/the blessing of God] the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit', but you can make whatever gestures you are comfortable with or none.
Structure of the 10am Parish Mass
(other masses will follow the same basic pattern)
The Mass can be broken down into four main parts: the Introductory Rite, which includes the greeting and a confession of sins; the Liturgy of the Word which consists of two or three readings from scripture, always finishing with a passage from one of the four gospels, and the sermon; the Liturgy of the Eucharist, when bread and wine are brought to the altar, the priest gives thanks and prays that they may become the body and blood of Christ, which we share in at communion (more on how this works practically below); and finally the Dismissal when we give thanks for what has just happened and are then sent out with a blessing.
About halfway through the service, as a hinge between the Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist, we have what is called the 'peace'. After the introduction to the peace it is traditional to share a 'sign of peace' - a simple greeting usually in the form of a handshake. This isn't quite the same as greeting someone in a non-church context - it isn't really the right moment to catch up on the weeks news or to introduce yourself to people (the best time for that is after the service). Nor is it necessary to share the peace with lots of people or to go wandering round the church to find people you know - sharing the peace with those nearby is sufficient. After the peace a collection is usually taken. You don't have to pay to come to church, but on the other hand supporting the church financially is an integral aspect of church membership, and anything you can give is greatly valued.
At communion time, people go up to stand or kneel at the edge of the dais to receive communion. If you are accustomed to receiving communion at another Christian church, then you are welcome to receive communion here. If you do not wish to receive communion, you can still come up to receive a blessing - if you carry the service booklet with you this serves as a sign to the priest that this is what you want. Children are also encouraged to come up for a blessing.
After mass, please come through to the hall for tea or coffee and to meet others. You will hopefully receive a warm welcome, but not everyone will realise you are new (someone you assume is a regular member of the congregation may be new themselves, or they may think that you've been coming for a while and are a bit embarassed that they can't remember who you are) so do tell them! And do make yourself known to one of the clergy. If you think you will want to make St Thomas' your home, there are family membership forms available for you to fill in.
See also: Children In Church FAQ